tony macaroni

2003-09-22T19:40:00.000Z

HELLO EVERYONE

Am really sorry for being a slacker on the blog front, but everythings gone even more mental. As you all know, I've been doing a work placement, which has gone so well, I've been promised the worlds best reference from the company, and the ppl that set it up are really proud of me and said that I was a 'good ambasodor' for them. I am a superstar. I had my last day last week, and i was really sad. This is only the second time in my life I've had a work thing that i really enjoyed, coz it never felt like work. So i'm know sweateing it and trying to put together 10 whole lectures a week for 161/2 hours of slapping my gums.

Even more amzing

I've moved. Now why is it amazing? Well, I only found out about the whole thing on Tuesday. My mate emma phoned me to ask if I wanted to move in, and i said i didnt think i could coz of the deposit and all that, but it was a ll sorted, coz the guy who moved, by the name of charlie, has said he'll wait fro me to give him the pennies. so i got a coupla months grace on it. As if that wasnt amazing enough, phil, surfless geezah, who also lives here, helped me move, and its all happened so quickly as well. My heads still spinning.

The view is amazing

Basically coz we;re right on the seafront! I get to eat my meals while looking out over the solent, and today we saw trhe most massive wainbow! It went all the way to the horizon,and there was a golden glow where it hit the water. How mental. This is so cool, and I'm even going to sleep with a smile on my face at night, which is something i've never done. When I was little I always used to get scared. I'd shut mt eyes, try to think of something nice, like my mum told me to, so I'd think of a picnic, but it always went horrible. Currently, I'm not having to do that at all. I just get to go off to sleep with a happy smile of my face, and wake with a gentlemans morning problem. Lifes hell HAHAHAAAHAHAAAAA

2003-09-02T20:32:00.000Z

Stitched up good and proper

I hate to even admit this, but I've let myself get shafted by a garage. On Saturday someone noticed I had a leaky tank, so i called the AA, who apperently came out and fixed it, but then about an hour after started leaking again, so I got myself under the car, did man stuff and drained the tank. I took 15 litres of fuel out of it, about half a tank, and managed to get monday off so i could find a garage. Which I did, unfortunately I didnt walk away when the guy said, worry about money later, we'll see what the problem is first. £230 for a new tank on a car thats worth about £100.

Like I said at the start, I'm more angry with myself coz I let this happen. Normally I'm pretty careful when it comes to garages, but due to the fact that I wanted it done asap coz it wasnt safe, and i got to go to London at the weekend for a wedding and then back down to go up to Leicester on sunday, I obviously wasnt. I have been stung. BOLLOX!!!

2003-08-26T21:06:00.000Z

Today i have mostly been

untangling a shit load of various leads, and soldering. I've been at my placement which isnt at the council like I thought it was gonna be, its with a sound and light company, and they're a really nice bunch of blokes. Absolute stars the lot of em. I'm feeling lucky. the untangling thing was fun coz I like untangling things. Its a full on puzzle coz you got to take it apart a bit at a time, and it gets easier and easier the further you get into it. Its also a nice way to think about things, coz you're untangling something outside, you might as well have a go at untangling something inside, which is good as well. Unfortunately, the soldering, altho easy to start proved to be an utter bastard. An utter, utter bastard.

Losing My Virginity

I've never done it before, soldering that is, and I started off ok connecting the wires to the back of the connectors, and theres one lil bit that isn't a whole, its a sticky upy flat thingy, and the last three were so much bloody trouble, I'm sure I'm gonna have to do it again, but if I dont, i've only got 21 more things to solder, so I'm either gonna be a superstar solderer at the end of it, or have very sore fingers, not from picking my nose btw.

Getting angry

It pissed me off to say the least. i was getting so angry with em, like I say coz the ones before i did fine, and was getting frustrated, but the journey home was, annoying, frustrating. For the first time in my life I was yelling 'FUCKING MOVE YOU FUCKWIT!!!' at a car in front of me who was getting in the wrong lanes, stopping at green lights etc, and i just wanted to get home. Bastards!!!!!!!!!!!!!

But Anyway

More news on the Job front... I have to go all the way to Leicester for training, and I'm hoping the Uni halls is next to a bar coz i think I'm gonna need a pint when I get there. I'm even gonna do it on the train. Save the miles on the Demon Cavalier, which has just had a new CV joint fitted on the front, and passed its MOT, phew, but the guy reckons it might not get through the next one, which is a bit off a pisser coz its a nice car, but hey, I want a motorbike anyway. My mate steves just got an alfa romeo, and it fuckin motors. It pulls serious G's as it accelerates. Full on sphincter clenching astronaut stuff. Tis mental. but I guiess I need a car first. All a bit a t a time, no want it now. Smeagle want it!!!!!

Anyway..................................

2003-08-23T15:41:00.000Z

The Hiss-Panic Movement out on ???august 11, as in its out now(or it might be sept 11, dunno) on Loog Records

This is Hiss' Debut album, and it is totally awesome. It's inspired by the super dodgy biker flik 'Psychomania' which is about a wild and crazy bike gang, who knoe no shame, seriously you should check out their clothes, superdodgy, and do a load of mumbo jumbo deal with mr D'vil. Each member of the gang then tops themselves and is buried only to come back from the grave. one of the best bits is the bike leaping forth from the grave, but anyway. It's also inspired by Panic Movemant, a 60 psychadelic group who were into confrontational happenings, obviously not hippies then, but all that aside, this is really good solid garage rock, full of psychadelic riffs, several hundred horse power and some seriously well written songs. This is creme de la creme ppl. As part of the forms i have to fill in when i get music, one of the sections has been fave tracks on this album, and let me tell you it aint been easy, but I've gotne for Brass tacks, Back on the radio, and Not for hire.

This lil quote sums it all up 'We hope its a record where you can listen to every song all day every day.' and personally i reckon they've achieved it. 10/10 to THe Hiss. Keep up the good work.

Freq Nasty-Bring me the head of Freq Nasty-out at some point on Skint

Iknow normally i do reviews on rock albums, but this ones for you all you ppl who love you funky freaky fucked up breakbeat. Freq nasty is one of my fave breakbeat artists. The man, I think is a genius, and he's proved it here. The album drags you off on a groovy trip of sci fi tweaky noises, with twisted vocals and FUNK. It really does.Come let me know is gonna be the next single to be released off this lil baby, so keep your minds open and if you haven't heard of this superstar before, check him out. Tis v rewarding.

and don't forget, you have the power. Try before you by and let your ears make the decision...

PS offers of sex are greatly appreciated. females only need apply.

2003-08-20T13:29:00.000Z

AMAZING NEWS

I finally got a job offer!!!!!!!! I'm gonna be teaching on a course called access to music for 9 hours a week starting in october. But it gets better. They've also said that its a foot in the door, and a chance for them to get a better look at my skills, and then hopefully they'll give me more work!!!!! Its so cool. I really never thought this day was gonna come, and that i end up having to work in a factory or something, but its happened, I've done it, i finally got a job thats gonna be worthwhile, and, and i get proper teacher training as well. I can become a Dip Ed, to add to my BSc Hons and my ODA. its crazy!!!!!! So thanks to all those who showed concern at the fact that i had too much time on my hands. By the way, my palms are very soft. lol
:oD

2003-08-19T16:41:00.000Z

I am Kloot-released on Sept 15th on Echo

This is the mancunian trios second album, preceeded by 2001's 'Natural History'. If you haven't heard these guys before, they're Indie, and they're good. Some of the songs are Dilonesque, and are very beautiful, meloncholic, and other such big words to do with emotions that I don't know. However there are also some slightly rockier moments that are a bit more uplifting, tunes such as Life In A DAy and 3 Feet Tall. Fortunately, they dont sound anything like oasis, which in my books a good rerason to check em out. Oh and it sounds like it'd make excellent snuggling music btw. In september, they're gonna be zipping up and down the country like a yo yo gone mad doing lots of live gigs. For everyone in Pompey, its on the Mon 6th at the wedge, for everyone else, you're gonna have to check your local listings coz I dont want to get rsi. well no i dont, but I can think of better ways to do it, arf arf.

Him-Love Metal-released soonish i guess on BMG

This is HIM's fourth album, and its a bit of a corker, and is also under a newish genre. LOVE METAL. It is full on rock, but definitely has a slightly softer edge to it. A little fluffy and romantic I feel. With a combination of influences such as Slayer, Tchaikovsky, Brian Eno, Hendrix, Johnny Cash and Roy Orbison, its easy to see how this fluffy bit of rock has come to life. Its melodic and solid, you cant say fairer really, but I do think this little quote really sums up the whole thing:

“I’m still quite amazed how easy it was in the end, making this album,” Valo confesses. “But then again, as we all know, Elvis has already done everything! I guess the man gone and took the load off our backs.”

See a well rounded sense of humour. How cools that. As I said tho, it is very romantic rock, but its pretty good.

So remember, you're the ones with the pounds, check it out before you buy it.

2003-08-18T22:19:00.000Z

I'VE DONE IT!!!!
I've made it to 33, and its been a really nice surprising dat as well. I got new trainers courtesy of my mum, pissed courtesy of my dad and grandad, a model of a sherman tank (hyuck hyuck) from Drumfan, an illustrated Terry pratchett book from my mate steve, and a 6m lead from my housemate vinnie for my basss as well as a can of Castlemaine 4x from my housemate Ian. Its been a pretty splendid day and no where near as horrid as i thought it might be. Eloons even offered to send her sister down, how nice is that, its fantastic and BW popped in to say Happy Birthday as well. This is shaping up to be a pretty good birthday and it aint over yet coz i'm having birthday dinner tomorrow at the vaults. MMM Nachos!!!! i also giggled again. 33! HAHAHAHAAAAAAHAHAAHAHAAAAAAAAAA, and my arms havent dropped off or anything nasty. i think thats made it a good day to. I've also realised today that I am nearly a proper sensible and responsible adult, but I'm having a pretty good time and growing old disgracefully, even tho I'm still a young pup! Its been great! So thankyou to everyone who's made my day. BIG HUGS TO YOU ALL!!!!!

2003-08-15T19:03:00.000Z

Hello everybody peeps
Unfortunately as BW asked, I've not been on hols. I've just been having a super hectic time of it lately. On sunday wghilst in the middle of doing a post my monitor decided to blow up. It wasnt spectacular or anything. There was no shower of sparks, no billowing smoke, or sign of Godzilla, just a rather sickening cracking noise and it went blank. That was it. Dead! I thought I'd have a go at an engineers reset (not as impressive as it sounds, just unplug it etc) but that didnt work. So I went out to the utility area ( I dont know what else to call it) and got the monitor out of there thats been sitting there forever only to find out that it doesnt have a built in lead, and that when I'd plugged it into the mains, that that one didnt work either. So it I was in monitor hell.

It really was
I've been trying to sell some stuff I've had for aages, with no success whatsoever, but fortunately, one bit did actually get sold, well PXed is a better phrase, for a nice nearly new 17" monitor. ITS SO BIG!!!!! AND SO CLEAR!!!!!! i dont know how I lived without it! I really don't. So that one out the way, its also been MOT time on the car, which I thought would've been nice and easy except I found out after the MOT that one of the tyres was a different size to the rest, and that the size of the rest is now a fairly rare size coz its bigger than standard. i dont know! I dont know why they is on there coz they're the same tyres that have been on it since I got it. Fortunately I managed to get one from Kwik Fit, after a trip to Hi Q where I was told that they'd have to order one in 'special' and that it was going to cost, but they didnt get my money. The other annoying thing with my motor is that its got a tiny whole in the zorst, and I slapped a bandage on it last year, which went all dry and nasty, slapped some putty on it this time, and was driving round thinking about how nice and quiet my car sounded, and its boody gone again. DAMN DAMN DAMN!!!!!!!! So I guess I'll have to go and be manly again and get under the car and make lots of strange mechanic like utterences and do sharp audible intakes of breath, teehee.

I didnt squinny, well just a bit
I've also been a really brave little soldier as well. I went to the hygenist for a clean up, and seeing as I'm suffering with sensitive gums at the minute, she put some local on it, which numbed my entire mouth (I could've snogged a thistle and been none the wiser) and she went to work. I know everyone else is super brave at the dentist, but i hate it. I even told my dentist how much i hate it, and she's such a good dentist, she has a good look, hardly sticks the proddy thing in my gob and it takes about thirty seconds. She's so cool I could marry her. However, after such lovely treatment from the hygenist, I think I'll have to ask her to marry me to. the last one was a really nasty bit of work. She was sticking all these nasty bits of metal in my gob, and NAGGING! She was an uber bitch. She was the kind of person who would be funny on a sit com, but not in real life when you're the one sat in the chair.

OMG!!!!!
As for everything else, its my birthday on monday, and as one of my friends pointed out, I'm 25 again, which is the 8th year in a row. I dont know why, but I'm kinda wishing this one'd just go and hide somewhere. I didnt have this problem at thirty. I just laughed. i really thought it was the funniest thing ever, but this just seems wierd. Mind you, i never thought I'd see it, so i guess its a bonus.

Oh, and just in case anyone was wondering, I need a shag. i think I might change my name to Marvin as well so I can be a paranoid android, i'm feeling very marvin.........

2003-08-04T15:27:00.000Z

Kid Symphony-The Underqualified-out on ??/04

As you can tell fron the release date up there, I've gotten this rather early, but dont fret coz you can get the single, Hands on the money, on October the 20th, which is the first track on the sampler and is a full on rocket dancefloor pleaser thats gonna be getting caned on the radio I'm sure. Its got everything thats needed to get this band noticed. As for the rest of the sampler, its got some pretty good tunes that are kind of in the light indie/rock arena. Very likeable music thats easy to appreciate sums it up well, and there are places where you can hear their influences which are quoted as Queen, Bowie, Radiohead and Nirvana. I really don't think you can go wrong witht this, unless of course you a hard and fast trancer, in which case, it your loss.

Billy Talent out on 01/09/03 on Atlantic

These guys have been building a good underground following for a while and are now on for their first major label debut, and I'm quite glad its happened. Its basically full on jump around mosh til you drop punk, and its bloody good. it kinda reminds me of At the drive in in some places, but its no bad thing coz its different enought on stand on their two feet, if you get my drift. First single off the albums gonna be try honesty, and it is soooo asss kicking! Its bloody amazing and well worth a look. I imagine the vids probably gonna get a good airing on MTV2 etc, so keep em peeled.

Black Eyed Peas-Elephunk-out on 15/09/03 on AM records

Pure quality. And it shows in this lil quote 'This is a hip hop record but we didnt go into this with hip hop on our minds' says will.i.am 'We were just thinking of good songs, good music. We didnt want to say anything typical, like like 'My styles this, and my rhymes are like that'. I like it when people think like that. Good Music is Good Music, and if tis truly good, I reckong the majority will just appreciate it without questioning it, which is pretty much what the BEPs have achieved. Fair enough, the first single from the album 'Where is the love' is pretty commercial, but anyone who disses em for that is gonna miss out on the other tracks on the album that aren't. These guys have bills to pay to don't forget.

and don't forget, try before you buy. You have the power!!!

2003-07-31T13:12:00.000Z

Oh, and I need a shag, thats probably got something to do with it as well. Having a quick sherman will not sufice, cos as we all know, theres nothing like having a warm body to snuggle up to. And a motorbike, I'M OPEN TO OFFERS ON BOTH OF THESE POINTS, so if you're female, willing to buy me motorbike, and shag each others brains out, we could be onto a winner. I know theres absolutley no chance of this ever happening, but hey, you don't ask, you don't get.

2003-07-31T13:06:00.000Z

HRUMPHHHH!!!
POO PANTS PANTS PANTS PANTS PANTS PANTS PANTS PANTS!!!!!!! POOOOOOO!!!!!!
I'm feeling a tad pissed of again, but its with good reason. Last week we had a cat come visit us. She basically shot in through the front door last thursday, which i found out on Friday, but went straight out the back door, etc, so my housemate never mentioned it. The next day tho, she came back into the house, and my house mate tried to grab her, got her cornered in the bathroom, and shot out for between his legs and into my room, and hid under my bed. The only annoying thing was that I had to go out in about three quarters of an hour for some lunch, so I left her there for a while to settle, then pulled the mattress to one side, which aint easy in my room cos of all the stuff i've got and said hello.

She's so sweet
Soppy I know, but she is. Little balck cat under the bed that with some very gentle coaxing eventually came out, tried to get back in again, but I managed to get hold of her and put her back outside. So on Friday I went round all the houses on the opposite side of oru road to see if she belonged to anyone over there, but she didnt, so i put some signs up on all the local lamposts, and got her some food.

The journey starts
So while I'm putting these notices up, this guy says that he's seen a cat missing sign down another road about a mile away, so i went and checked it out, couldnt find it, went into somerfield and put up a note in there, and then went on a mission round portsmouth to find the owner, but theres loads of kitties that have gone missing round here, and none of em were this one. The thing that gave it away was that she'd recently been spade, so I only really needed to ask that question to find out if it was their cat or not. One of the ppl I saw told me about the chipping thing and that I can take her to a vet and see if she's been chipped and then get in touch with the owners that way. So I toddled off home, phoned up the Cat Clinic, our local cat specialist vets, and sorted out a basket so I could take her down ther to be scaned, but then.....the phone rang!

Have you got our cat
This woman said. She's called Moss, and she's recently been done, and about 18 months old and she's not long had kittens. Basically cos I wasnt sure, and I really wasnt, I agreed with her that I'd go to the vets, do the scan and if its hers I'll bring it round. So, I managed to get her in the basket, by first giving her a bit of turkey ham, to keep her occupied, putting another bit in the basket so she had a nice surprise when she got in there, and went for it. No problems at all. She had a minor effort at escape but I saw and put my hand over her head to shut the lid, and it was done. EASY PEASY.

Another wONDER OF mODERN TECH
Unfortunately not my spelling, but this chip thing, cos it turns out that she was chipped, and called moss, which I called on the way to the vets and she didnt stop meeowing aftert that. Poor little thing wasnt very happy cos she was in the cage thing for a good half an hour, but i got her home, and her owner was very happy and grateful. It turns out, she's recently had kittens, then been done, and hasnt been right since the kittens went, and the owner reckons she was off looking for em. So I did a good deed.
Bummer
the only bummer is, I'm actually missing her. I kinda got used to going down into the kitchen and seeing her little face pop up and with that 'whats going on?' type of thing thats cats do, and making a fuss of her cos she's so nice. This is toooooo soppy. I'm a man, I'm not sposed to feel like this. Its only a cat for crying out loud! So I'm know figuring that at some point I'm gonna get a cat. Once I've gotten the Job, the motorbike, the place to live, I reckon a cats got to be next on the list.

Too soppy for me own good :o(

2003-07-30T16:27:00.000Z

Alien Ant Farms New album is coming!!!!!!!!! No its not iona big sweaty mass of baby oil squiting fluids everywhere, but its gonna be on the shelves very soon, so keep an eye out for it. Date on the website for release is 19/8, but that might be the american release date, am not sure, so keep yo eyes open.

So, I got the sampler for this. Its only four tracks, but its bloody good, and different from their last album. It has a genuinely different sound and feel to it, so if you're expecting more of the same, you're gonna get better. Its got a bit more of a refined and rock rock feel rather than erring towards the punkier side of things, and they got some help from Robert and Dean Deleo from Stone temple Pilots on the production side of things, which is vey nice. Personally STP get the Tony Macaroni thumbs for great shagging music. If you haven't tried it, try it. Anyway......

2003-07-28T20:17:00.000Z

Its Been a While Longer.....

but I got a good excuse cos I've been dead busy with a couple of application forms, which I'm sure many ppl might be pleased to hear. one of ems for a teaching Job on a course called Access to Music, and the others an Asst Tutor Job, both of which are at least connected to my degree. woohooo! I'm also definitely gonna be doing a placement at the local council events dept which I'm really looking forward to, but am a bit scared coz I aint done nuffing like 9-5 for years. i even have to dress smart but casual! yeeeeeuck! oh to be allowed to wear jeans and trainers.

So anyway

Ace Sounds Still Hungry, out soon on Ace Sounds

Aint to sure on the proper release date for this coz I cant find the blurb, but its Ace from Skunk Anansie collaborating with loads of top stars including Lemmy, Jason Perry, Saffron, Skye, Benji, Yap, JJ Burnell, and loads more. Its basically one collaboration per track, making for a bit of a musical orgy really. Every single tracks also got its own style related to the artist he's collaborated with, which makes me wonder, is this a compilation album or not? For example, Jason Perry's track is nice light bounce around indie thats full of smiles and is gonna get dnaced to lots and played to death on radio one. Lemmy's track is dark, funky and full on old skool rock. its more gravelly than a driveway. Deeper into the album you start getting some really good quality hip hop action as well. The man is fingering many pies, and its come off good. Better than that. Its pretty close to genius.

The Bumblebeez out on 18/08 on Witchita

this is basically mental, in the best possible way. It really is sooo clever and well made, and innovative as well. These guys are really well worth checking out. Even more so coz they is antipodian as well. Using the 'one mic/one take tecnique' as according to the bumf 'its not about perfection, its about catching the vibe' and they've so managed it. They really have. If you're prepared to get excited about something this august, I reckon this could be the thing to put your bets on. According to NME its a 'cut n shut of the beasties, beck and the hives' and they aint wrong. I'm not even gonna attempt to describe it to you, just so you can find out for yourselves and enjoy, enjoy, enjoy, all through the remainder of the great british summer.

and dont forget, you can try before you buy at all good music retailers

2003-07-23T10:39:00.000Z

Jeez its been a while

a whole week in fact, or is it 10 days. I can't remember. Only problem is that its been nice and sunny, and I keep getting distracted from doing my blog, which is pretty crazy, but it is with good reason, trust me.

Rubbing shoulders with the stars
Last week was the grad ball, and I got to DJ it, which was nice. As per usual tho, it ran about as smoothly as a well square, well thats not realy fair, it just had a bit of a funny start. i was sposed to be playing my first set from 7-8.30, but due to the fact that the decks werent ready, and then there was some technical problems, ie there was only one cd player, and when that was connected no signal came through, I ended up doing 15 minutes. Yes a whole 15 minutes. It was sposed to be 1/2 hour by the time I started, but the schedules were all wrong, so the band had to come on to make sure it all ran on time. Second set wa the full half hour, and it was cool. I went from Beyonce to System of a Down in half an hour. I really never thought I'd get to play system at a ball, but I did. It sounded so good coming out of a massive PA. And my last set which I also thought was gonna be half an hour turned into 20 minutes warming up for the bluetones with some indie rocking spectacularity, was all good at the end of the day

Best Bit
And it really is in my books, even tho the whole night was excellent, but I got a whole crate of beer to take home with me as well, and, and ,and, After I finished, I went out to watch the bluetones and eat a burger, and ended up chatting to a nice young lady for an hopur or so, but her mate who we bumped into on the way to the can turned round and went 'Oh my god! You were up on the stage! What are you doing out here amongst us commoners?' Now thats the first time thats ever happened to me. Ever. Ever ever ever, and I felt really good. It was really nice to get some recognition, just to have one person go 'cool'. On top of that she was real nice as well. Dead pretty. I'm still abit confused about the commoners thing tho. I guess if ppl see you up on the stage, they think you're above them, which is a shame coz I still have to wipe my own ass just like they do, and to be truthful, they don't see all the poo/self doubt/frustration I've been through to get to where I am etc, but I have to say, she totally made it all so worth while. Just a shame she had a boyfriend.

2003-07-23T10:19:00.000Z

Jack Johnson On and On, on Island Records out now

Definitely an album that I really think the majority of people are gonna enjoy. 17 tracks of gentle and uplifting guitar music, that are so easy to appreciate, it makes you wanna cry. These guys aren't really new to the world as they have worked individually with lots of other musicians on projects, and Jack Johnson used to produce Surf Films, which is no surprise once you know he's from Hawaii. This love for the sea is definitley reflected in the album with its super chilled feel, gentle reggae rhythms, and tropical nuences (now theres a good word to use). It really is like having a cuddle with your most fave cuddling partner. Its warm and loving and caring, perfect for those days when you might be feeling a little under the weather, or those , ahem, intimate moments when a gentle touch is whats needed. Its lovley.

and dont forget, give it a listen before you buy it, make up your own mind, and enjoy it in the safety of your own sanity.

2003-07-13T15:53:00.000Z

Bell X1 Music In Mouth(album) out on 21st July on Universal island

I know I did about this album a couple of weeks ago, but now, now I have the whole album!!!! and its really good, so I thought I'd go for a reminder and recomend it yet again. Very beautiful music.

Kiss Kiss Symphony:Alive 4 out on 21st July on Kiss Records.

Cock Rock ago go, all the way. ITS KISS!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!! This really is one of the most amazing albums I've received I think, purely cos of who it is. Its really exciting. ITS KISS!! but seriuosly, ahem, the album was recorded during Kiss' 2003 tour at Telstra Dome, Australia, with a sell out attendance, and the Melbourne Symphony Orchestra, who appeared in full Kiss make up, and I just soooooo wish I could've been there. They've captured the energy of the gig so well, and it sounds like so much fun. It features six classic Kiss tracks without the orchestra, six never performed live acoustic versions and twenty two newly recorded live tracks. It is immense, it is fun, and it brought back a really nice memory for me. I can remember years ago wanting to stay up and watch Kiss in concert on the telly, so my mum let me and my bro watch it on the telly on his room, but it was on late, and I was but a young pup, and went to sleep, but my bro stayed up and woke me up so I could watch it. How sweets that. Anyway, Its on two CDs thats split into three performances, two on the first, and the final movement on the second, and the there's a DVD release of the concert planned for later on this year. So dig out that spandex and ROCK!!!

Superjoint Ritual A Lethal Dose of American Hatred out on 21st July on Sanctuary Records

This is not for the faint hearted. This is full on hardcore, rough, hard, fast punky rockingness. For those of you who haven't heard of Superjoint Ritual they're formed from members of other bands who have all done pretty darn well for themselves and are fronted by Phil Anselmo of Pantera fame. I used to so love listening to Pantera, and I got to go and see em live a couple of times to, and had a full two minute crowd surf at one of the gigs. I was such a happy little headbanger. This is just soooo bringing it all back to me, the fun, the pleasure and the neck ache I had virtually every saturday morning. This is a full on assault on the senses, and although it is hard and full of angst, still manages to stay musical, and enjoyable, and something you can sing along to. Believe me you can. As Mr Anselmo says 'Every Superjoint Ritual song is crushin, is brain destroying, but on top of that they're songs as well, not just noise for the sake of being noise. To see the entire front row screaming every lyric while ppl are landing on top of their heads, boots in their faces.....that feels great, man!'

and don't forget, you can try before you buy.

2003-07-09T18:52:00.000Z

MARS VOLTA at The Wedgewood Rooms

Thats who myself and Drumfan dude went to see last night, and it was absolutely mental. I felt like I was orgasming for an hour, and I haven't felt like that at a gig since I went to see the Stone Temple Pilots in about 1994. One of the most mental things about last night, was bumping into a bloke and a girly who had come all the way from Coventry to see em play. Hows that for commitment, and I even splashed out a tenner for a rather snazzy bright yellow Tshirt. Its very cool. They need checking out, they really do, but I warn you, its not gonna be to everyones ear, and it does take a couple of listens to the album to even get anywhere begining to appreciate it. So go to it Power Rangers. buy this album and get it to number one, just so's everyone in the country knows their name.

2003-07-06T16:59:00.000Z

Frustration a go go
When I first blogged, I had a right good whinge about my love life, and I'm gonna do it again, basically cos I is narked with it. But don't forget, there other things that are probably more interesting under this bit

Aghast
Last night I went out with drumfan, dropped off some flyers that've been sent down for the Kings of Leon competition at a few of the local pubs and went out on the sauce. Now I know this sounds kinda weird, but I knew I was gonna bump into an young lady I had a one stand with a while ago. The worst thing about it was the next morning was all nice and rosie til it was time to go and the 'What next conversation' started and I said i really wasn't ready for a relationship, she said the same, but the atmosphere went from nice to feeling a bit on the yucky side. It was nasty cos i could almost see her heart deflate, but we agreed to go out for a drink.

Why did I bother?
The next saturday, she phoned me up to ask if I wanted to go down to a local club for a beer and a boogie, and I thought it was kinda handy cos i'd been thinking in the week that maybe I'd been a bit quick to judge, and how much of a shame it was to blow it out of the water. However, when we met up, she only had enough money to get in, so i ended up buying all the drinks, and she proceeded to tell me that she didn’t want me to get involved with her coz she's not a nice person to be around at the moment, spent more time talking to other ppl than me and kept running off. I ended up walking out of the club feeling rather angry, and didn't bother to say goodbye, cos I didn’t think she deserved it, but she did say about going out for a drink again.

I really don’t know?
Now I know I upset her. I really know that, and last night i said, do you still wanna go out for that drink, and she denied all knowledge of it, and i said, I'm sorry if I hurt you at all, and she denied all knowledge of that as well! I'm know thinking she can go forth and multiply, and I feel like a fool, and am guessing that I needn't feel so bloody guilty about it, and I just feel like a bloody fool.

It gets sillier
To add to this, I went to one of my regular haunts to meet up with some ppl, and ended up just feeling pissed off by the end of the night cos there's a young lady who i fancy, that was there, and I don't know why I fancy her now. Every time I've seen her whilst out, she stands there going 'Do I look alright, Do I look stupid while I'm dancing etc, and I always say no, cos she doesnt. Its the truth, but she always ends up pissing off and chatting to someone else, leaving me wondering why I bother. Last night she almost totally blanked me, and I offered to hold her bag for her so she could dance, said no and then gave it some other bloke instead. I am so sick of it, and am starting to wonder why I bother.

And sillier
To top it all off, some bloke offered me out while I was handing out the flyers, for what reason I don’t know, probably coz he was bigger than me, and I also ended up inadvertently swapping numbers with a girl who is a very nice and genuine person, but not my kinda lass. This brings me to the point that I’ve always been amazed how the people you fancy are either to cool to respond or aren’t interested, and, it’s a shame to say, vice versa. Tis a dichotomy.

But I’m still in one piece
Now today, to add the funny twist to it all, Drumfan and I (using proper English grammar, 10 points pour moi) went out for some lunch at a fine local eatery, and bumped into an ex, who is also a friend, and normally I have a lot of time for her, but today, kinda couldn’t be assed really, (but its always nice to see she’s happier in herself these days, she really is one of the nicest women I’ve ever been involved with) and a conversation sprung up that I obviously couldn’t be involved in, reasons immaterial. That’s just the way it was. Then we went in to order food, and bumped into another load of friends out for post hen/stag do food, and one of the girls there is another ex one nighter. The odd thing about that one was that I knew I was taking a wrong turn when I agreed to go out for a drink with her, and know I’ve found out that she’s not a very nice person after doing some sneaky character assassination, (although not that sneaky, it was about as subtle as a day glo pink brontosaurus standing in front of a floodlight) and every time I see her now, she tries to shrink back into the shadows, which I don’t have a problem with cos as far as I’m concerned, I don’t really want to see her ever again.

Claptrap
So today I’m deciding, and declaring yet again that its all a load of nonsense. I’m trying not to swear to much, coz I’ve decided I do it too much. The most ridiculous thing is that even tho I’m sick to death of it, and at the moment feel like I don’t ever want to go out on a Saturday again, and never look at/talk to etc etc another woman again, I just know its impossible! I know sooner or later I’m gonna end up getting it together with someone, I know I’m gonna get in a pickle, I know I’m gonna have a post bonk smile on my face, and even tho I’m really annoyed with it all, I can’t help myself. I really cant. While we were eating lunch I was eyeing up women, but I just couldn’t help myself. I am at the mercy of a sex crazed evil puppeteer, while life seems to stand by laughing. Nature is a bastard, and so’s every thing else. Life is taking the Michael, yet again, but I’m hoping its decided to do it all in one swift weekend so I can bloody well get on with it. Poo revisited is still poo! I was starting to see the funny side of it, but now I’m not. Mind you, got to laugh. Sods law did its job, and apparently these things come in threes according to the old saying, so hopefully this weeks gonna be a bit more bearable. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

And once more, Claptrap
One of the other things that has got me with this is that I seem to be going through almost the same thing as I was when I was a teenager, and it’s not gotten any easier. At least when I was a teenager I was the right age to have irrational strops, and get frustrated and full of angst. Now its just frustrating. I really don’t think I’m asking for much, but it just seems to evade me. Maybe its just not the right time, whatever that supposed to mean, but I guess I know its not, cos if it was, I wouldn’t be sitting here inflicting this immense essay on you all about how angry I am, I’d probably be having a lazy Sunday in bed with my girlfriend, or going for a nice stroll down the seafront.

2003-07-05T16:50:00.000Z

Longwiew Debut Album Released on Mercury 21st July

Not to be confused with Greendays track Longwiew, this Mancunian ensemble have put together a very pleasing album. It's kinda Coldplay, Travis sort of thang, but they're definitely their own band and coming up with a cornucopia (I thought I'd use some big words for a change) of good music. They got some nice slowies, some nice up beat tunes, as well as some positive ones like 'Still' which goes ' Good times are coming' which is always a good thing in my book, cos it reminds ppl that it may be poo at the moment, but it can get better. Tis the power of music.

On The Road
They're currently on a mammoth tour of the UK tour, and it is mammoth cos they're doing the north and from the second week of july they're all over the south and then doing T in The Park at Kinross, and, as if that wasn't enough, they're also gonna be doing Leeds, 21st august, and Reading, 23rd August. Definitely a band to look out for, so keep your ears open, cos they've had record of the week on Radio 1, and for those lucky ppl in london, they're A List for airplay on X Fm.

And don't forget, try before you buy.

Competition news

Kings of Leon, are playing at the Lollapalooza Festival in Central San Francisco on 19th August, and if you enter this competition, you not only get the chance to go and see them, but you also get to hang out with em afterwards. How Cools That!!!!!!!!!

All you have to do is go to the HMV site and stick your details on the Kings of Leon Microsite to be in with a chance. And if anyone who goes through me blog to enter it wins, please please take me with you. I can fold up quite small, honest!

2003-07-03T15:25:00.000Z

Cross Lateralist
I've just found out thats me. After I did the left/right brain test the other day, courtesy of BW, I started to wander yet again about why I use my right hand to write etc, right eye to aim, and left foot to kick. I have also just remembered that when i was a youngster, I boxed southpaw. After a whole afternoon on the net, I've know found out I have Crossed Laterality. Unfortunately, I cant find any more info on it, apart from all the references to learning disabilites etc. So, if anyones got any answers, I'd appreciate em.

2003-07-02T12:41:00.000Z

Am I A Lucky Boy or What

I'm just listening to the new Kings Of Leon Album, out on the 7th July on Handmedown Records. It is wicked full on slacker music. Its jangly, its bouncy and its got more finger licking southern style than a mississipi pimp. According to me bumph, Caleb Followill, the singer says that he looks at albums like movies.

'If you watch a good movie, you'll get slow songs and fast songs. If you watch a stupid movie, it'll be all fast songs. if you watch an overdone movie, it'a all slow songs. i want our albums to be like a good movie soundtrack. I want it to have everything in it, all parts of life.'

Which it has, but it aint no movie soundtrack, ala pink floyd, type o thang. It goes fast, it goes slow,it gets relaxed and gets furiously good time blow on the bell jar and skiffle that wash board to death. I think my ears have fallen in love. All I need to do now is find a young lady to , ahem, 'road test' it and suss out its full potential. Its definitely sexy enough, and so raw. Actually,I think I need to find a bus load of women, cos this is definitely gonna be getting played to death, and its definitely brightening up the fact that its chucking it down outside. Thank you Kings Of Leon.

So my loves, check it out, and dont forget you can try before you buy at any good record store.

2003-07-02T12:07:00.000Z

Drumfan dude sent me this lil joke, which may be on his sight,bit I'm to lazy to check, but what the hay, its funny enought o sufer twice ;o)

An ugly man walks into his local pub with a big grin on
his
face.
"What are you so happy about?" asks the barman.
"Well, I'll tell you," replies the ugly man. "You know I live by
the railway, well on my way home last night I noticed a young woman
tied to the tracks, like in the movies. I, of course, went and cut her
free and took her back to my place.
Anyway to cut a long story short, I scored big time! We
made
love all
night, all over the house.
We did everything, me on top, sometimes her on top!"
"Fantastic!" exclaimed the barman. "You lucky sod. Was she pretty?
"Dunno never found the head."

BOOM BOOM!

2003-06-30T18:53:00.000Z

Cheers BW. I am this. It all sounds jolly good, but i don't get the bit bit at the bottom, which may just be typical of me. I dunno Shaggy.

Tony, you possess an interesting balance of hemispheric and sensory characteristics, with a slight right-brain dominance and a slight preference for visual processing.
ie, the right side of my head is biggfer than the left, and I enjoy porn.

Since neither of these is completely centered, you lack the indecision and second-guessing associated with other patterns. You have a distinct preference for creativity and intuition with seemingly sufficient verbal skills to be able to translate in any meaningful way to yourself and others.
I've been trying to tell everyone this for years.

You tend to see things in "wholes" without surrendering the ability to attend to details. You can give them sufficient notice to be able to utitlize and incorporate them as part of an overall pattern.
Does this mean I am now certified as a good lover, or just a sooper genius?

In the same way, while you are active and process information simultaneously, you demonstrate a capacity for sequencing as well as reflection which allows for some "inner dialogue."
I'd call it inner argument actually

All in all, you are likely to be quite content with yourself and your style although at times it will not necessarily be appreciated by others. You have sufficient confidence to not second-guess yourself, but rather to use your critical faculties in a way that enhances, rather than limits, your creativity.
Yes I am a perfectionist, which can be bloody annoying at times.

You can learn in either mode although far more efficiently within the visual mode. It is likely that in listening to conversations or lecture materials you simultaneously translate into pictures which enhance and elaborate on the meaning.
So I'm not schizo then.

It is most likely that you will gravitate towards those endeavors which are predominantly visual but include some logic or structuring. You may either work particularly hard at cultivating your auditory skills or risk "missing out" on being able to efficiently process what you learn. Your own intuitive skills will at times interfere with your capacity to listen to others, which is something else you may need to take into account.
Hold on. Don't tell me,its the 6 of clubs.

I actually did this twice, coz i realised after I'd done it that i wasnt just answering, I was thinking too hard about it, and it came out exactly the same. I knew it was right, but hey, you know how it is. DON'T YOU. :o|

2003-06-28T15:49:00.000Z

Check These Out
This weeks bands to keep an ear out for are, in no particular order

Bell X1 released 21st July-Island Records
These guys are from sunny Ireland, and currently have a rather large emerald Isle following, and their first album, which was an Ireland only release did rather well. Now they're over here and have got rather a lot of talent. They really have. Theres a definite intensity in their music, with good song writing. I guess its gonna fall into the category of Indie, with influences such as Radiohead, David Gray and Talking Heads. I'm thinking its the kinda stuff you're gonna hear on the radio more than a club, and its very good bedroom/relaxing type o thang.
Elbow realeased 18th August(same day as my birthday woohoo) on V2
More beautiful bedroom music, that is poignant and heartfelt I think. Its also very good thinking music as well for some reason. I kinda found myself laying back relaxing and letting thoughts drift along and fall into place very nicely, which is always good, but I could just as easily imagine lots of people enjoying it together, in those, you know, 'intimate moments'. *smirk*
Motion City Soundtrack Out Now on Epitaph
This is a lot more upbeat, and definitely more dancefloor friendly. These guys have been gigging for ages in the states building up a solid fanbase of 'rabid basement-show going kids' and its no wonder really. They know how to right a good song, they know how to make it rock, and they know how to make it pleasing to the ear. Can't go wrong. So if you're into Sugarcult, American Hi Fi etc, you probably already know these guys. If you dont, check em out. Its a very worthwhile album.

and as I always say, don't take my word for it, go and use your ears to find out whether its really what you like.

2003-06-28T15:25:00.000Z

Strangely Enough
You know I was saying all this might blow up in his face (re housemate), well it looks like it might. Life's doing its funky thing with him, cos he went down the pub, and his B.O.T.S. phoned him and decided to join him for a beer, at which point his phone rang. So he went outside cos it was his woman. She says 'Are you at the festing?' He says, 'I'm just outside. How can you tell?' She says 'I can hear ir in the background. I'll be down in a minute to join you.' So it looks like it's all blown up in his face.
Good Nose
However as I'm writing this, a thought popped into my head that maybe he's been set up. They were in the pub chatting on their own, and both admitted that they chatted as well, and I'm suspecting that they decided to get together and see what happens with him. I'm hoping I'm wrong, but how can someone tell what pub you're at just by the sound of it? Is more than just a lil but suspicious if you ask me.
More Advice
I did suggest that this is probably a good time to develop a broken leg, but fortunately he disagreed. It does make you think tho, cos women being the fairer sex, and I'm glad they are, are pretty cunning when it comes down to it. Mind you, I guess you'd have to be seeing as every bloke who looks at you probably wants to make babies with you. Fortunately, Its not our fault. It's nature. How bad a tricks that.

2003-06-27T12:21:00.000Z

And Now for Todays Installment
Remarkably, my housemate has totally gotten away with it, and its kinda to do with me. Should I be proud or ashamed, I don't know, but when he was saying about meeting them bothin the pub, I said 'Probably be best to go "Girfriend, B.O.T.S" and vice versa, and then say sorry but I've been an utter bastard', and as I've already written he's still alive, and in possesion of his gonads, basically cos of my advice.
More advice
When he was telling me what happened, and that it was all still up in the air, I said said 'Sod it, if you can get away with it, you might as well keep em both on the go.' I did add that if that does happen, I'm never gonna talk to him again.
It bloody well worked
Yesterday, he got his first phone call off his B.O.T.S., who said she was very upset that he'd done the dirty, but was willing to let it go, cos he's told her it was a one nighter with the other one, but he's also told her, before this all happened that he doesn't do realationships, and she's still up for it.
Not Once But Twice
His girlfriend phoned him that night in the pub, and he basically said the same, even tho his girlfriend said that she had been chatting with B.O.T.S.and she was talking relationship, and he got away with it again on the drunk one night stand card. It also turns out that she's cheated on him, cos she was feeling lonely, at which point he did say maybe we need to quit then, but girfriend said 'No No, I want to be with you.', which just goes to show how crazy life is.
Doubting Thomas
i do still get the feeling this all might blow up in his face, but I did say to him that the only thing that'll top this is if he manages to get em both into bed. I'm hoping that he does, cos he did say that if that happens, he's gonna send one of in for me. How nice is that. :o)

2003-06-26T22:08:00.000Z

I got this as one of my comments today.

Should you be gossiping about your housemates on here! and who cares anyway!! Stumled upon this site thinking that there might be something interesting to read, Big Brother? You seem to be the real thing, get a life!

I think the fact that the person who's written this seems to have no idea what the point of a blog is, and the fact that they haven't even got the decency to leave their name, shows that they are foolhardy in their comment, and that their boss really has employed the wrong person. They demonstrate a harsh and bigoted judgemental nature, which is bolstered by more ignorance than the entire US of A. They can't spell, probably has an IQ that is slightly less than a glass of water, and twice as uninteresting, and was probably a bully at school. I would like to be able to name and shame this egotesticular maniac, however as I have mentioned, they don't have the balls to even sign their comment. It does appear that this person is the sad side of the wonder of 21st Century technology, especially as they work for a company that is supposed to be about the media, productivity, creativity, expression, and that I have helped this company, voluntarily, with a project in the past. It is a shame, and that is a fact.

2003-06-26T21:39:00.000Z

How Mad?
Last week I bumped into someone I know who's a bit of a wicked producer, as well as being a top guy, and I told him that I'd started to play bass, and he said it was a strange coincidence cos he was looking for someone to stick some bass on something he was doing, and asked me if I wanted to. Of course, I had to say yes. Oppurtunity was too good to miss.
Shell shocked
The totally mentalisdt thing is that a) its a really good track, and I really am not just saying that,, and b) I did it in four takes! I've got it at home on CD and it sounds sooo cool. I cant believe it. I'm a bit shocked at it all really seeing as I only picked the thing up about 10 weeks ago, and I keep on surprising myself how well I'm doing. Its totally BRILLIANT!

2003-06-26T12:57:00.000Z

Am on the new one
And it looks very swanky, but I have some juicy juicy gossip. My housemate has a girlfriend, and has been seeing a young lady on the side. He was telling us on Tuesday that, of all the coincidences in the world, it was his girlfriends birthday, and they were going for drinks, but his b.o.t.s. had invited him out for a drink, and they were all gonna be in the same pub!
Death & Stella
So we laughed and giggled and speculated that he's probably gonna be a dead man, and if he walks back through the front door, it'll be some kinda miracle.
A Miracle Occurs
And it is. He's still alive. Turns out, he went down tut pub, and he saw em both, and they both asked if something was going on, and he just laid his cards on the table and introduced em both and then spent the rest of the night not knowing who to sit with, and table hopping and feeling a bit uncomfy, but so far neither of them has given any ultimatums, ripped any limbs off, or is wearing his testicles for ear rings. Its still not over yet, so I may find out more later.

2003-06-24T18:35:00.000Z

Goldfish
Was watching Newsround earlier, and have decided I'm a bit concerned that the whole dumbing down thing is going further than I thought. they had a news report on there about Iraq, and at the bottom of the screen is the pop up thing to remind you of whats going on, just in case you happen to be a goldfish, and the presenter introduced a journalist who's just come back from Iraq, and the pop up appeared 'She's just got back from Iraq'. Does anyone really need reminding of that fact, cos it looked really bad, and I dont if kids really give a monkeys, but its a bit insulting to their intelligence.
Trees
It was almost as bad as the appaling bit of camera work on Richard and Judy this afternoon. They were interviewng the guy out of Nicholas Nickleby of 'Queer as Folk' fame, and the director decided to go for a cut to the trees that would pan down onto Richard, Judy and the Interviewee. Unfortunately it didn't quite work cos the when they all came back in to shot, the interviwee wasn't there. Well, his legs were. I dont know what happened to the rest of him, but he suddenly reappeared again in another camera. I was worried that he might fall out of my TV at any second and spill Pims all over the place.
Losing The Plot
My other little quibble about TV today is that at 5.30, the tennis goes over to BBC2, WHY? and theres nothing on apart fronm BIG BROTHER, and the news, meaning I'm watching the news. When will this hell end? Please someone help. Its not much to ask that star trek is broadcast 24/7, is it?
Ice creram
Fortunately there has been some saving grace in all of these mad cap events, cos I went down the seafront with my friend Leslie to enjoy the sea air, the sun, ppl with hardly any clothes on, and ICE CREAM. I'm gonna detract slightly, but the Nestle ice cream stand on Southsea Seafront selld Lemon Meringue ice cream, which leslie swears by, but me being an old stickler spotted the Stawberry Split, now a Mivvi, and had to go for one of those cos they are scrummy and cure all ills. Even Death. So we've sat, enjoyed said Ice Creams from the Evil Nestle Ice cream Stall (if you dont know, Nestle are currently trying to force women who work for them in third world countries to use nestle food rather breast milk, which aint good, cos breast is best, or so I've been told. Appatrently its no good in tea, or on cornflakes though), and decided its time to head off for food, only to see two pigeons having a bit of nookey on the promenade. I know its not something thats amazingly new, or uncommon, but it was a whole lot better than the telly, and a damn sight more productive, I'll wager.

2003-06-21T16:49:00.000Z

Just Goes To Show
This week I've had three bits of rather good music through, all of which have a bit of a stroy to them that show how even ppl that face a lot of hardship can still get somewhere, which I'm actually taking some encouragement from, having not had a particularly easy life myself.

Beer and God
first up is The Kings of Leon. The story goes that their whole family are either on drugs, in jail or preaching. When these guys were very young (they're all brothers and a cousin) their dad swapped a life of crime and drink for preaching and they roamed the southern states spreading the word of god and sleeping in cars. Unfortunately their dad hit the bottle again, and was defrocked, and took the brothers to Oklohoma City where they turned to music to escape poverty, which has worked out quite well, cos now they've got a contract and their first album, Youth and Young Manhood is out on the 7th July, and Is really, really good. The single, Molly's Chambers, which is a cracker of a garage rock tune with a southern feel is out on August 11th.

Perseverence Pays Off
Next up is Trapt. These guys originally got together at school in the mid 90's and there first gig at their high school went down really rather well. By 1998, they were opening for bands such as Papa Roach, Dredg and Spike 1000. Unfortunately there came the decision as to whether they should split and follow the route of education, or try to make it as a band. They did there best to try and make both work together, which wasnt easy because they spread over a 100 miles, but they all still got together to practice , purely because they really believed in what they were doing. In 2000 they were approached by Immortal, who quickly lost interest, but they kept on going, dropped out of college and moved to LA. Now, they're about to release their self titled debut album on WB/zig zag. Unfortunately I've got no release date, but keep your ears open. Its punky and good quality, and takes a couple of listens, but the rewards are well worth it.

Coming Round Again
Crackout are releasing their new single on HUT 2 years after they were hailed as the new saviours of rock, and then forgotten by the media. Fortunately, they haven't been put off, and have been working hard, by all accounts, and have come up with a very good tune called 'Out of their Minds', released on 21st July. Its very different from their first album, which was good quality rock, but this release demonstrates a very clear change of sound and style towards the more garage rock side of things. Keep your ears open for this, and hopefully it'll bring a more stable success than their first album.

So there you have it pop pickers. Hope everyones enjoying the weather, and dont forget, if you're barbecuing chicken, make sure you pluck it first. the feathers are a bitch if they get stuck between you're teeth.

2003-06-18T19:34:00.000Z

Man Stuff
Yes I am empowered! I have the ability to use a tool set, the money to buy it and the necessity to warrant it! HUZAAR!!!!! I changed my rear brake shoes today, which was much fun. Unfortunately I spent far longer doing this than I expected cos some bits weren't playing cricket! Fortunately, my trusty, brand new B&Q 99 piece 4 draw tool kit has some MOLE GRIPS which proved to highly essential in loosening off a siezed hand brake adjuster. I only wish that Haynes would do work on their cars for the manuals when they're about 10 years old, and at the kerbside, rather than in a spangly workshop.
SEX!!!
Mind you, it did give my brain a good workout which it needs every now and again. But my tool kit is spangly. I only needed a 3/8 driver and extension, (is anyone bored yet?)but the price of em on their own is half of what the tool kit cost, and its got so many handy things, including some obligatory crap spanners, half of which are in imperial! Its The 21st fucking century for fuck fuck fuckings sake!
FST
Speaking of fucking, I've been reading a bit of sherlock holmes, ie a study in scarlet, and the hound of the baskervilles, and to my surprise Dr Watson is sex mad, holmes says ' get your hat' watson says 'you wish me to come?', and he's ejaculated twice as well! there was me thinking this was a detective novel, but its not! Its all about SEX!!!!!!

2003-06-17T17:24:00.000Z

Bored Bored Bored
Was watching telly last night, and after the West Wing had finished, the choices were big brother, shit, more shit and Nascar racing. Bearing in mind that I think motorbike racing is one of the truest man and machine sports there is (contact patch, about the size of a credit card) I was having trouble cos it was BORING. I couldnt believe it when the commentator said 'Only another 65 laps to go'. How come the drivers dont fall asleep?
Old Bangers
So I was gonna ask if anyone knew what the point of NASCAR is, but I dont need to cos I know now. You know how americans have to do everything bigger and better than everyone else, well we have banger racing where a load of nutty car enthusiasts ram into each other for fun to entertain the crowd, and it really is fun, but I figured that NASCAR is banger racing at 200mph, and is dressed up to pull a crowd who just wanna see if they crash or not. The chances are, and I did see this last night, that if one of em loses it (technical term for crashing that) he's gonna take out at least one other car, and the chances are that he's gonna take out about a half a dozen, and they're probably gonna blow up. I did just remember the other point of NASCAR. Days Of Thunder.

2003-06-16T14:44:00.000Z

So what
Oh My God! Two of them are gonna have to leave the house on friday. If they keep that up, BB will be over much quicker, and I wont have to put up with ppl asking me if I know whats going on! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!!!!

2003-06-15T14:05:00.000Z

I could look a proper wally
Well I probably do anyway, so what the fuck. I've been having a little think, which is actually possible, and I didn't strain any muscles at all, and I've even done a little bit of research.
Gabbing
I've basically been having some very informal conversations with some young ladies I know, and listening. Is that a stunned silence I hear? A man. Listening, to A Woman? No it can't be, but I did, and I've even learnt some stuff. Way cool. One of which was 'You think women are complicated, you wanna try understanding men.', which is something I never ever thought of, probobly coz I am male. Well there you go. That one got me to. Stunned is not the word.
Postulation
So after about thirty seconds of thought, and a night on the sauce, here is the

25 Questions Women Might Want To Ask Men, But Probably Already Know The Answers To, And I'm Really Only Guessing

1What is the fascination with my arsehole? Its where poo comes out

2Why do you insist on trying to chat me up when you've had so much beer you can hardly keep your eyes open. Its not flattering, and its only likely to get you nowhere?

3I'm offering you no strings sex, whats the fucking problem?

4Why is every other driver on the road a twat? You wanna check out your own driving.

5Have you ever tasted your own sperm? Try it, you might understand our reservatons about having a mouthfull of it.

6When you get lost, why dont you ask for directions?You're not a bloody canada goose.

7Why do you have to insist on trying to fix everything, breaking it, and having to spend even more money getting the mess you've made sorted out?

8Whats wrong with stockings? You'd look great in em.

9If you wanna do me up the bum, can I buy a strap on so you can find out what its like first?

10Whats the problem with cleaning the house? You manage it with your car alright.

11Why is it that when I suugest something, its ignored, but when you do, its the final word, and then when it all goes wrong, you start blaming everyone else?

12Why do you insist on buying a stereo for your car thats got more power than an A bomb, and driving round withit so loud you can here it from 50 miles away. You twat.

13Why do you want our fannies bald? Lets get your balls waxed, and you can find out how painful it is.

14Its a double bed! Why do you have to use all of it?

15Whats the problem with me being able to change a car tyre by myself? It's not a threat to global bloody piece.

16Where you going? You've only been down there thirty seconds.

17Why do you have to be in charge all the time, even tho you know I am really?

18Do you really need all those bloody gadgets. They're wasting space and are gonna cause a global fuckin meltdown!

19Why do you insist on picking your nose? Theres no gold up their!

20Why do you insist on learing at us, catterwalling and yelling in a attempt to get our interest?It just makes you look like an idiot. Stop it!

21Who says you own the road?

22Whats the fascintation with shooting your load over my face? I'm not a bloody porn star, and Estee Lauder moisturiser is much nicer!

23Why do you expect sex to be on tap?I'm a human being, not a bloody sex doll!

24Do you know how to use incators?

25Why are we in this ridiculous position? I'm getting cramp in my leg, pins and needles in my brain, and I think I've dislocated my fucking cervix!

So there you have it. As i said, I'm really only guessing, and I haven't the foggiest really, so, if any ladies happen to stroll into my blog and want to add their own questions, please feel free. Just think, you might be helping me and my as yet, unmet 'Her indoors'. ooh,that bit rhymes.

2003-06-15T13:31:00.000Z

Why Did I say That!
i did have to open my big mouth didnt I. Last weekend I was rocketing towards 300, and now, its creeping. I've had afternoons at work go quicker than this, but that was a long time ago, so I could just be romanticising.

2003-06-13T00:36:00.000Z

A Good Thursday
Am totally amazed! Last Week I breached the 200 barrier, and its fast heading for 300, this is so cool, and I'm rather drunk and should probably be in bed, but hey, i can sort out my typo's not!!!! I really dont care too much tho cos I've had a wicked night out.
Live Music
Surfless were playing at The Barn in Milton tonight, or maybe that shoul dbe last night even, hhhhhurrrrgh, thats better. Was really cool. They are so good, and I'm not just saying that. I met em all through my mate Emma, who lives with the lead singer Phil. She's a bit of a star. So, Surfless did a really good job, and Phil admitted he was having a bit of trouble getting into tonight, basically cos he had no stage, but once he got to Barbie Killer, he was in thwere and up for it, so to speak. Phwoooooar! ( Phil, note to self reminder here) and, if anyone wants to listen to some surfless, I think you can download it off the site, or go to phils blog and if you can find a contacty thing, I'm sure he might send you a free cd.
Intimate
So, The Barn. Its intimate. Its basically the back of a pub and apparently they used to do the live music upstairs, but now its down stairs. i guess its for the best cos all that gears a bastard to carry upstairs, but its got such a nice atmosphere. its really friendly. Super friendly. The nights called Roger Courtney's Open Mike Music Club, and is named after the guy who used to run it, but has recently passed away, and his son has carried it on.
This is a local bar
Not. i really think they're there with open arms to everyone apart from utter fucknozzles. Friendliest place. it really is. By the way, did i mention they're really friendly.
Other Stuff
According to the second guy to perform, there was a bit of a hubbub about who was gonna go on after Surfless, cos they did rock, and kept it up for an hour(hyuck hyuck) I so wish I could remember his name cos he was amazing. Really beautiful music, and theres more info here. they've also just been signed so you need to keep an eye out for em.
more Good News
To add to all of this, Surfless have just sorted out some serious management. (We are de management) Hopefully its really gonna help em to get out there alot more, but they are gonna be playing the Guildford Festival, which I should find a link for, but am too drunk. bllaaaaaaah!!!
The Bad News
Well the downside to tonight was a young lady, who after rather alot of fall over juice insisted on getting up and singing. I really hate to say this, but it was 10/10 for effort. Mind you, she might have got more than nil points at eurovision, bless her cotton gusset, but other than that,it was so cool. There were two sisters doing Freak Like Me, and they were really good, old bluesy guys, and a drummer that I'm sure was in Raw Sex. He so looked the part. If you ever come to Portsmouth, you need to check this out. they even hand out a load of percussion type instruments to get some audience paticipation going, and do th night night song, where everyone gets to say goodnight to everyone. its so sweet.
SNOAR
Right, I'm off to bed to dream of, ......... stuff i guess. just hope its not the one i had a while ago when I fell asleep to My housemate vinny playing slide guitar, and had a dream about a giant snake under the bed playing guitar. Hhheeeeweyew. That was freakky. Sweet dreams all, or maybe even good morning.

2003-06-12T16:45:00.000Z

Judge Jules @ UPSU
Just in case anyones interested, Judge Jules is coming to Porstouth Student Union on Thursday 3rd of July, on The Judgement Sundays Ibiza Warm Up Tour. Tickets are available from UPSU, and the Wedgewood Rooms Box Office. Tickets are £10 with a 50%! Yes 50% discount for students.

2003-06-12T11:34:00.000Z

I had a go at this courtesy of me old mate Drumfan, pop pickers, and managed a whopping 240 miles an hour. Fandabby super duper tastic. let me know you're scores, the fastest gets a wrist support.

2003-06-11T18:15:00.000Z

Editorial???
It does seem that my post '25 questions' has caused a stir. It was really only meant in jest, and to kind of prove a point that the real ones a load of balls. I was merely venting my spleen, cos it needs it. i'm not a masogonist, although i do indulge in mastication. truth be told, there are a lot of women i admire, but the oppurtunity just seemed to good to pass up. So, I know I only have two regular female visitors, both of whom are very welcome, but, do you really want men to be more like Ralph Phines? Go on, tell us, even if you just answer it to prove me wrong and show me that the real one has a smidge of truth, but do you not agree its poo. I shall address the balance tho. I can feel the creative juices starting to bubble.

2003-06-11T09:58:00.000Z

It was there earlierhonest!!!!!!
Am a little concerned over the Remove URINE STAINS banner at the top of my blog today. Surely it'd be better if it was for joke urine stains or something. Mind you, I can produce those by myself. hya hya hyaaaa.

2003-06-09T23:12:00.000Z

Pass The Sick Bag
I'm fairly sure that most of the ppl who are on the net, specifically those with a hotmail account, will have come across the super sickly '25 Questions Men Want To Ask Women Link'. If you havent you can check it out here. I read this possibly cos I'm , sad, or thought it was a good idea to do some research and got suckered into thinking it might give me a clue. I am but a mere mortal after all, but it didnt.
Hello Darling
However I am wondering if this was properly researched, by doing things such as asking a bunch of pissed blokes what questions they want answered. I suspect not cos the only real question would be 'Do you fancy a shag?' In fact I'm fairly sure that its more along the lines of the Daily Mail article that appeared during the 'Iraq War' suggesting that the country was preparing for food rationing, which turned out to be a 'what if' article, concerning itself with the possibility of your local Sainsbury's, or even worse, Oddbins being bombed.
Awwwwww
So, being inspired by this amazing resource, thats obviously meant to trick women into going 'Aww, that's so sweet.' and making them rush home with rose tinted glasses to prepare a slap up meal, and shave their legs etc for their man, I''ve come up with some of my own, totally ignoring the fact that there are always exceptions, and don't forget the disclaimer at the top. Its there for a reason. Mwaahahahahahaaaaaa.

25 Slightly More Realistic Questions Men Probably Want The Answer To, But Are More Likely Interested In Only 5 Of Them

1 Why can't you reverse? Its really not that difficult.

2Why do you start asking me whats going on 30 seconds after the credits have stopped rolling, I didnt write the bloody script.

3Why do you expect me to clean? I'm not genetically designed for that sort of thing. (Its true!)

4Why do you carp on about how great women are, how wonderful you are, and then when it all fucks up, hide behind the excuse of being FEMALE!

5Why do you insist on dragging us round the shops all saturday. All men hate it, apart from my cousin ham, but then he'd rather spend his money on trainers than paying the bloody phone bill!

6What do you expect to gain by asking us what we think you look like in that dress. You'd probably look great in a fucking potatoe sack!

7Why is it that full support for all your 'projects' has to be given, but as soon something I'm interested in turns up, its CRAP!

8How can you be jealous of a motorbike/car/boat/steam train. Its made of metal, and it doesnt have tits!

9Do you really need all that fucking make up?

10Why is it ok for you to fall asleep during a film that I like, but I'm expected to pay full attention and answer questions on chick flicks. BLEEEURGH!

11Why do you cop the arse when you find out that women arent allowed to fly jet fighters? You'll crash it into a mountain, and that wont be while you're reversing it.

12Are you really mental?

13Can I have a blow job?

14How do you know you wont like it up the bum if you've never tried it?

15Whats with all the subtley crap? If you just ask if I wanted a shag, I'd probably say yes, mind you there are limits.

16Why, after a night of rumpy pumpy and me being exposed to every mm of your flesh do you nick the duvet to hide behind while you go for a waz, and leave me to bloody freeze?

17What do you mean, you dont 'swallow'?

18Whats wrong with stockings? I look great in them!

19Jaw Ache? You've only been down there 30 seconds and you weren't putting in that much effort!

20Whats the point of all the whinging you do, when you're never gonna do anything about it?

21How can you excuse buying stuff you dont need, cant afford, and then have the cheek to take it back to the bloody shop! You'll destroy the economy for fucks sake!

22Why do you think its great to act like a lad? Its not! You're female! You look like an idiot!

23How can you get me to the point of having a diamond cutter, and then turn round and say no, I dont want sex? Its not only frustrating, but really fucking painful!

24Why do you need a four wheel drive to do the bloody school run when you dont live in the middle of the country side? The only person its safe for is you, and no one else, especially if you're reversing!

25Fancy a shag?

Now you've read it, if you are female, do take it seriously and are offended please refer to Q 12

2003-06-09T19:47:00.000Z

MP's Shock Defeat
Just in case you missed it, The Journalists from the Times effortlessly whooped the asses off the MPs on University Challenge with a score of 115 to 25. Personally I was hoping they would go out for a duck, but alas, they didnt. This was avoided by the conservative MP for stone, demonstrating a bit of knowledge about Beethoven (gee theres a surprise) and another one who knew a bit about photography. You'll have to excuse the lack of names, but I wasnt actually expecting to be writing about University Challenge, much too high brow for my liking, but on this occasion, was an extremely rewarding bit of telly. Thankyou Mr Paxman for ripping the poo out of them, and well done to the Times for employing some very well read people. I just cant wait to see if the Sunday Sport have got a team together for this.

2003-06-09T17:29:00.000Z

Arthur Conan Doyley
Am reading some Sherlock Holmes, courtesy of Marky Mark. Its really good. Its like being in a really magical little place. The one thing that has struck me, and it wasnt a golf ball or a frying pan, is how Dr Watson is normally portrayed as having a Grain Alcohol Storage Facility, and being a bumbling fool, but in the book he's described as being thin and very under the weather after being nearly killed whilst in Afghanistan, and getting a chronic case of Delhi Belly on the way back. According to the story he nearly died, but at last. I now know how they first met, why they ended up living together, and how all those wild and whacky adventures started, but I'm not telling cos this weeks homework is reading A Study In Scarlet. So go to it, and no more Star Trek til you've finished.

2003-06-09T17:21:00.000Z

Its a strange world
My mate Mark came down this weekend for a jolly. I was actually sposed to go to Bristol to see him for Birthday drinkies (his not mine), but Graham, or G as he is also known, was coming to Pompey for a stag do, so Mark got a lift down,and we had a really fun night out.
But not as we know it?
There were a few points that the music at pompey's saturday night rockish thing was not rock at all. I'm turning into an old git I'm sure, but Duran Duran is not rock, well i know it maybe in some ways, song structure etc, but its actually New Romantic turned POP. Bloody kids! You'd have thought they'd all be requesting Faint by Linkin Park or summat, but NOOOOO! For Shame, for shame.
Good thing come and so do I
Sunday being a day of hangover (this is the real reason why god needed a rest) started with a quality breakfast at Mary's Cafe on Waverly Rd, (just in case anyone forgot I'm in Portsmouth). £4 for the biggest plate of artery gooing food, toast and a cup of tea, plus its only 5 minutes from the seafront as well. Apparently, mark was telling us, that they used to put a slice of quiche on the breakfast platter, but no more alas.
FOUR!!!! I SAID BLOODY FOUR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Next was a spot of pitch and putt. Its one of Portsmouths best kept secrets. It really is. I've been here since 97/98, and I only found out about it last summer, but I'm glad I did. Its a really good laugh, and none of us being anywhere near good enough to take it seriously managed not to kill anyone, which is nice.
Dads day out
The bloke behind us was doing his best tho. He was competetive dad, and was teeing off before we'd left the green. Bastard! and the ppl in front, a dad and 2 sons, came a bit unstuck when the eldest of the boys got hit in the head, by what i dont know, but one minute he was upright, and the next minute he was on the florr, bless, with his dad yelling 'Are YOU ALRIGHT!!!!!!' in his face. If it was me i would have said no you clumsy twat, you've just tried to kill me and now you're trying to make go deaf. Stick your inheritance up your ass, I'm off to live with the circus!', but it wasn't. hahahahahahahaaaaahahahaahaaaaaaaa
Didnt we do well
At the end of the round we had a sit down and waited for G to come and meet us and had a lil drink. The elderflower squash was super, and Drumfan managed to get on par for one whole, but all in all we all did really well. i was impressed to say the least. I think we must have averaged about 4 shots per whole, but the final scores were Drumfan 45, me 45, (how crazy's that) Mark geez 47. Never thought i'd get excited about golf, but there you go.

2003-06-09T16:56:00.000Z

Grandaddy-Sumday, dont know when its out, but its good, and should be out soon.
Definitely a Sunday afternoon album this, or maybe some easy listening for when you're stuck in traffic jams. Its kinda rock, but as you may already have gleened, its rather light. I dont mean in the sense of flacid rockers such as Brian Adams and the like, but genuinely gentle. As I always say, check it out. Its really worth while, and appreciable, but dont go and buy it on my say so, go and listen to it, and then make up your own mind.

2003-06-09T16:24:00.000Z

Got this from Drumfan the other day and felt it was more than suitable for posting
HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT: (new 2003 version)
> >
> > 1. She is not a BABE or a CHICK - She is a BREASTED AMERICAN.
> >
> > 2. She is not a SCREAMER or MOANER - She is VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE.
> >
> > 3. She is not EASY - She is HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE.
> >
> > 4. She is not DUMB - She is a DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY.
> >
> > 5. She has not BEEN AROUND - She is a PREVIOUSLY ENJOYED COMPANION.
> >
> > 6. She is not an AIRHEAD - She is REALITY IMPAIRED.
> >
> > 7. She does not get DRUNK or TIPSY - She gets CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED.
> >
> > 8. She does not have BREAST IMPLANTS - She is SURGICALLY ENHANCED.
> >
> > 9. She does not NAG YOU - She becomes VERBALLY REPETITIVE.
> >
> > 10.She is not a SLUT - She is SEXUALLY EXTROVERTED.
> >
> > 11.She does not have MAJOR LEAGUE HOOTERS - She is PECTORALLY SUPERIOR.
> >
> > 12.She is not a TWO-BIT WHORE - She is a LOW COST PROVIDER.
> >
> >
> > HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:
> >
> > 1. He does not have a BEER GUT - He has developed a GRAIN ALCOHOL
>STORAGE
> > FACILITY.
> >
> > 2. He is not a BAD DANCER - He is OVERLY CAUCASIAN.
> >
> > 3. He does not GET LOST ALL THE TIME - He INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE
> > DESTINATIONS.
> >
> > 4. He is not BALDING - He is in FOLLICLE REGRESSION.
> >
> > 5. He is not a CRADLE ROBBER - He prefers GENERATIONALLY DIFFERENTIAL
> > RELATIONSHIPS
> >
> > 6. He does not get FALLING-DOWN DRUNK -He becomes ACCIDENTALLY
> > HORIZONTAL.
> >
> > 7. He does not act like a TOTAL ASS - He develops a case of RECTAL-
> > CRANIAL INVERSION.
> >
> > 8. He is not a MALE CHAUVINIST PIG - He has SWINE EMPATHY.
> >
> > 9. He is not afraid of COMMITMENT - He is MONOGAMOUSLY CHALLENGED
> >
> > 10. He is not HORNY - He is SEXUALLY FOCUSED

2003-06-07T16:10:00.000Z

At last its working. I've only tried about a billion squillion times to get onto blogger, but better late than never i guess. Anyway.
The Mars Volta-De-Loused In The Crematorium out on 23/06 Universal/Island
This is a very good album I've had through from those nice ppl at Wild. I dont think its got instant accessibility, but if you're open to new stuff, go and listen to it. If you're not, go and listen to it at least. Its really inovative and good and these guys are taking the music into places where it might not have been for a while. Even Mr Cedric Bexler Zavalas, of At the Drive In fame and writer of the songs, admits it'll take a couple of listens, but according to my bumf, all his fave records are like that. You check out more here
Just Jack-Girl With the Triple Tone Eyes
This one comes from Upshot, which is another nice company that sends me great tunes. If you missed the frist Single Paradise Lost, you need to do some catching up,this guys got bags of talent, and he knows how to write truly beautiful music, with intelligent lyrics. Featured on the CD are remixes by Hellraiser, the mighty Aphrodite and Dom1, all of whom have done a job that does justice to the original. Absolutely Fantastic. More info here
CORSETRY
and it doesnt stop there. I dont know if any of you will remember ,or even read this, but a few weeks ago I got the oppurtunity to have a chat with two of the nicest, and outwardly dressed ppl in Portsmouth, and the young lady owns a Bespoke Bridal Gown/Corsetry shop in Portsmouth called Devotion. Well I popped into to say hello, cos it is one of my fave shops and it looks like something out of a fairy tale. Its sooo pretty, it really is. Everything is made to mesure, and the dresses are stunning. While I was in there, two women popped in to check out the dresses and do some research/wedding planning for next year (handy hint-If you're getting married, start planning about a year before) and they were going all google eyed over the stock. This lady doesnt turn women into princesses for a day, she turns them into fairy princesses. Alot of the dresses are based around Victorian Corsets, with a skirt, and some times all in ones, depending on the weight of the skirt.
Kinky
She also does corsetry for men and women catering to the fetish side of life, and I was informed that most ppl come in check it out, go away and come back cos they cant help themselves. the links in the sidebar for all eternity, or until something else happens. I'm off to get measured up ;o)

2003-06-06T13:03:00.000Z

fixed rust bucket(but i love it)
woohoo! Have breached the 200 mark! and my car feels lovely. Its been feeling like the wheels are gonna fall off, and seeing as I've had to do London and back a few times in the last few weeks, it aint been fun, but the guys at my local garage did a fine job and it feels so nice. Watch out Schumacer! You're gonna be getting overtaken by a D reg Cavalier.
guts
I also had to have some blood taken, and nursey decided to a health check (no cough and drop tho, huh) but she did say I'm healthy, and only 2 stone left to shift. woohoo. Still no offers of rumpy pumpy tho. Oh well.......

2003-06-05T14:42:00.000Z

I think I'm getting the hang of this :o)
Giles Peterson
Just in case you haven't heard the amazing Giles Peterson is releasing Worldwide, Programme 3 on 16th June through Talkin' Loud. If you've never come across Mr Petersons stylings before, I highly recomend you check it out, at least. Full of Jazz, Hip Hop, Drum and Bass, African, and Detroit based sounds. A veritable cornucopia (ooh I used a big word), and its all beautiful music. Truly Beautiful. A demonstration that in the wild and whacky start of the 21st C, theres alot more to modern music than the average cheesy hard house rehash of the last cheesy hard house release. ou can check out some more info on Giles Peterson here

2003-06-04T10:35:00.000Z

Its worked and quicker than expected. So you can now go and check out the surfless sight, and have a look at Phils blog. Damn this is precious.

2003-06-04T10:27:00.000Z

Nasal Stimulation
I've just been wondering were the strange odour is coming from. I thought it was from the kebab I had last night, and I hadnt soaked my hands long enough in sulphuric acid to get rid of the stench. Fortunately i have, but I just remebered I managed to throw a whole pint of lager over my left leg. Everyone turned round and looked! Boy did I come over all shy. Fortunately the very nice barmaid at the wine vaults came and cleaned up, but didn't make me sit there in my underpants while my trousers were drying on the radiator, or offer to change my nappy! Pants!

2003-06-04T10:08:00.000Z

I've gotten brave and made some more adjustments to me blog, so hopefully you will spot some differences in the next couple of days, either that or the whole things gonna disappear into the electronic maelstrom of the net, and I'll have to start again. Its great not knowing what I'm doing but doing it anyway.
Music Stuff Drum Roll Pls
Less Than Jake have a new album out called Anthem which was released on the 19th of last month. if you aint heard it, check it out. Its pretty good and theres a few tracks that really stand out on it, which is nice. Check em out here. Bloody hell, if I'm not careful, I'm gonna end up being a full on geek instead of just having tendencies. UGH!

2003-06-01T23:09:00.000Z

Down the pub
I was down the pub with drumfan on thursday, the Still and West specifically in Old Portsmouth as it was a nice night for a drink, and a stroll, but i'm sure you all know that anyway, I'm glad summers here, I like hot summer nights, and sweaty bodies and oooooh, but anyway. Thats enough of that, teehee.
Get To The point
So we were chatting about stuff, sipping on soft drinks, admiring the driving skills of the ferry captains, and the abomination that is Portsmouth Millenium Tower, and DF mentioned how he liked my theory about us being like atoms. So on that note, I'm gonna share another one of my muses.
The Teachings of Monkey
Everyone knows Monkey, and the power of Monkey is IREPRESSIBLLE. Born from an egg on a mountain top. Monkey is Monkey, and never stops, la da da, heeeyyaaaaaa! But anyway, enough of the singing. In Monkey theres always little quotes from Buddha, and I'm pretty sure that its to spread the word of Buddha in a pretty funky manner. Maybe its Postmodern Buddhism, Buddhism for the Masses(if you think of a good word for this, slap it on the comments), and one of them is ' We create the world with our thoughts'. Know I'm fairly sure that what its really saying is that the way we perceive our world is based on our thoughts at the time, and what our thoughts send out, the universe sends back.
Molly Coddle
Black holes have recently been discovered. It was kinda thought they didnt, i think, but know they do, and mans walked on the moon (tower of bable link here I'm sure) which ppl will have said, that'll never happen, but it has. However both these things originally turned up in Sci Fi. Jules Verne wrote A trip to the Moon in the 19th century, way before any scientist even thought of it, and Disney were going on about black holes as well.
Enough rope to hang me with
I like going out on a limb, it often means i get told I'm wrong, but hey, its fun and I learn stuff, so. Disney made the film The Black Hole, and then a few years later, they start finding em. Is this a coincidence? Jules Verne wrote Trip to the Moon, and man walked on it. Tying this in with the buddhist quote, I'm basically thinking that the imagination of sci fi writers fuels scientists into looking for things, appetite wetting kinda thing, and its the thoughts of these ppl that create the universe. I'm currently hoping that someones gonna work out how to make one of those trunks in the terry pratchett books, cos I'm running out of room at home, and having something like that to cart round a load od tunes would be heaven.

This really did sound better when i was thinking it, oh well.

2003-05-31T14:01:00.000Z

I was just thinking about stuff, do alot of that, but I saw the Matrix the other day and theres a line where morpheus is going on about the past being the thing thats got us here, and made us strong, and its obviously been mulling around in my brain, so i just figured I need to understand the past, cos it has made me strong, and look forward to my future cos its what I've got. Please feel free to use that.

2003-05-28T16:18:00.000Z

MIND MASTURBATING
This really isnt a case of 'Oh I see, been at again.' just more of a continuation from DESTUCTION IS CREATION THING (see below). Basically, I'd been to my grandads funeral, which as unpleasant a thing as it is, was a really good send off. His mates from the Jazz Band he used to be in, Dr Jazz, came and gave him a musical send off, and I have to say its the first time I've ever cried to Jazz.
Blown Away
so after some good eats at my aunty's and a rapid jopurney back to pompey, I managed to perloin a bit of dooberage, which is something I dont usually do, well not these days anyway, I figured I needed a break, and I sat in my room, Mirror Ball on the go, Stone Temple Pilots making love to my ears, and relaxed and had a good old think about life the puniverse and everything.
I'M NO STEVEN HAWKINS
i cant actually remember how my train of thought got here, but it did, and I had a few revelational type of things going on, that arent really that amazing, but I thought I'd share it anyway. I'm sure most of us are aware of the theories of the puniverse, and my brain started chewing on em. According to the BBC documentary The Planets, the puniverse is created from loads of random molecules coming together that form stuctures that end up being asteroids, or alternatively a fuck off big lump of rock, and they all zip around smashing and bashing into each other, eventually forming planets etc.
LITTLE STAR SYSTEMS
Theres also that theory about our solar system being an atom in a being bigger than ours body, which can make sense, if you want it to, but with that in mind I started considering atoms, and considering that we have 9 planets orbiting the sun, we might be a flourine atom ( I hope I have that right. i did try checking it on a periodic table, but its been a long time since I did chemistry. If Its wrong correct me), and we could be sat in a pipe somewhere on its way to a tap, coz flourine is used in water to help us with our teeth. The only reason it seems to take so long out there, from our perspective, is because we are so small. Special, and GREAT, but small. Atoms also breakdown eventually, or get electrons stolen from them by other atoms, changing their structure.
LOVE AND MARRIAGE
So theres all these atoms zipping around creating puniverses, and obviously theres a shed load of stuff still going on cos the atoms make elements, and cells, and the cells join together to make organs, systems and bodies, and trees and fish, I'm sure you know the rest. Atoms obviously cant help themselves, just like humans. Some atoms make more stable couplings than others. With that in mind, I got to thinking about human relationships, and that maybe we obey the same laws as atoms. We all fly around randomly bumping into each other, sharing energy with different results. Some humans are very RADICAL in their behaviour, and some arent. Some move around the planet alot, and others dont, some make people laugh, others make them cry. Sometimes you get two people that bump into each other that form a stable bond and are together till death, kind of like atoms (even tho atoms dont die, but they can change).
WELL DONE YOU'VE READ THIS FAR
So we obey the same law as atoms. Prove it! Well atoms come together to form bodies, worlds etc. We come together to form babies, buildings, music, football matches. We also join with other 'bodies' , plants, dogs, sharks, etc, on the earth in their/our consumption, or the care we give them, or lack of, as they do with each other and us, and its all from a bunch of atoms that got together for a barmitzvah billions of years ago, which is pretty bloody amazing and kinda brings me back to my Grandad, cos essentially his body is gonna go on to help create a lovely bed of soil for a nice plant, which will convert Carbon Dioxide back into Oxygen, and help everyone. So even tho he's gone, he's still here as a random bunch of atoms making a difference to everyone in exactly the same way that we all are.
AND IF YOU'VE GOTTEN THIS FAR....
thankyou very much for taking the time to read this, and you can be safe in the knowledge that when our sun does blow up/ burnout, the puniverse will still carry on doing its thing, and life will continue because its obviously the nature of things.

2003-05-28T15:02:00.000Z

HUG ALERT!!!!!!
I just been reading Coops Blog and she really isnt a happy bunny, so if you can spare thirty seconds, pop in and send her a hug.

2003-05-26T17:16:00.000Z

ooh dear, another fine hangover, but it was soo worth it. I know everythings been going on this weekend, what with homelands and all that malarky, but i had a wedding to go to. I even turned down a gig cos of it, and i'm so glad i did. It was such a nice day, i nearly blubbed. Glad I didnt though cos panda eyes are just so not attractive.
The Ceremony
was fantastic. There were quite a few ppl there I'd never met, but there was just loads of smiley faces and Ian and Jen(now Mr and Mrs Davies) looked absolutely dapper. Ian had got himself a very nice suit with gold waistcoat and tie, and Jen looked smashing in her dress, and you couldnt tell she made it herself. She did such a good job.
The Photos
Which is just as well cos the photographer was definitely working for his money. We were there for about 3/4 of an hour having the photos, but fortunately Lamby (diamond bloke) brought along loads of confetti, and BUBBLES, so we all had fun blowing bubbles and getting bubble goo everywhere. Hopefully I should be able to get some photos, which I need to do really so's my mum can get a photo of me in a suit, which is a very rare occurence. Rarer than rocking horse shit.
The Meal
Speaking of rocking horse shit, the restaurnat doesnt serve it, but the food was absolutely FANTASTIC. I couldnt remember what I'd ordered cos that was like weeks ago, but I had Ravioli, which was an immense surprise cos I was exoecting Heinz size pockets of the stuff, but I am obviously very uneducated, cos it was the size of a cornish pastie, and tasted divine. I think it was mozarella, tomato and bazil filling. Then came the steak, which was just dreamy. I do love a bit. and the afters was nice as well, but one thing I've just remembered is the conversation.
Bald Nuts
I was sat opposite Tash who knows Jen, but we all know each other cos of the University connection and meeting friends of friends etc, and somehow we got onto talking about body hair. I think it started with the innocent area of haircuts, and wether I shave my kneck or not, and then Tash told me her boyfriends back is really hairy, and that she never knows where to stop, which brought up the subject of waxing, cos i saw on loose women the other day about mens waxing and its called Back Sack and Crack, and tash went 'Ooh that sounds terrible, but I dont know what I'd do if I came across a bald one' (refering to scrotums, just in case you were wondering) to which I revealed that iI used to shave mine, and that it definitely has its bonuses, and then Tash told me she knows that cos she does her bits. I was not to sure that this was really a suitable conversation, but we managed to move it onto a much safer arena. Sex Toys (arf arf).
Nancy
So food consumed and intimate details shared, it was time for a relax back at Lamby's, but on the way Lamby spotted a lil ol' lady in distress and asked if she was ok. She said she'd fallen over, and lamby, drumfan, rob and myself, helped her to her car which is a vintage anglia that she's looking to shift, so she coulod sit down. Now bearing in mind I'd managed to get lumbered with 2/3 of a bottle of red to myself, I was a bit pissed, and could i get the car door open. Not bleeding likely, but it got sorted in the end. So we sat her down, she insisted she was ok, mentioned how nice we all looked and said that if she was thirty years younger, she wouldnt hang about in trying to get her hands on us, (sweet or what).Sso we carried on to Lamby's. Myself and rob looked back when we were about 50 yards away to see her trying to get out of the car with no success, stopped to discuss it, and decided to phone the Police.
Making them earn their Money
So for some stupid reason i to phone the ppl at police HQ whilst drunk to get em to send someone down to make sure shes ok. It was not easy. I had that dread thing going on, kinda like talking to your mum whilst on acid, but we did it. Hopefully shes ok, cos we didnt see if they turned up or not, but anyway, after a couple of beers and whooping lambys butt at table football ( even more rare than rocking human shit) the day had gone and it was time to go to the reception.
The Trouble with Taxis
Cos I'd put together some cds for the reception, i had to shoot home get changed into my fatboy fat hawaiian shirt, and then get to the pub. Being a wise gent(well maybe just fooling myself there) I thought I'd ask the driver of the taxi that took me home to book another one for me in about 15 mins time. So i got myself sorted, ran up and down the stairs half a dozen times cos i kept forgetting stuff, and waited outside for about 20mins, cos the fat idiot of a dumbass taxi driver didnt book the bloody thing. Fortunately the lady at the taxi office was very helpful and sored me one out, getting me to the pub just in time to get it sorted and stick the tunes on.
Surprised Even Myself
Basically cos I was sat there knowing I'd done a good job on the tunes, and everyone was telling me that I had as well, which is sucha bonus, and everyone was having a really good time. The beer flowed, the food was tops and i got to have a quick balloon fight with Lamby cos we'd both been on best behaviour all day and not had a muck about at all.
Guilty Conscience
I am having a little bit of a 'hmmm' tho, cos myself and Drumfan were winding Ian up about turning up in various different things including bearded bridesmades, squirrel outfits, pinapple suits and as pimps, but we didnt. He did mention he was dissapointed that we didnt, but I'm thinking he was actually a tad releaved and when I told one of our other friends they were like 'Jesus, no wonder he's stressed'. Personally I dont know what the problem is. The day I eventually get married, how ever along away that is, its got to be fancy dress!

2003-05-23T19:00:00.000Z

am v sorry for being extremely slack and not doing this but i've a mightily hectic week, but I was thinking, well, mind masturbating actually, that DESTRUCTION IS CREATION, therefore, DESTRUCTION CREATES A LOT OF PISSED OFF PPL.

2003-05-18T10:46:00.000Z

80s matchbox b-line disaster
I cant believe that its 10.45 on a sunday and i've been up since 8. Sundays arent supposed to do this. Obviously this one is determined to be different, the bastard. Whats better is the fact that I got to go and see 80s Matchbox B-Line Disaster last night FOR FREE! (courtesy of Harry at WILD)Tres cool!!! It was an absolutely mental gig, possibly the best one i've been to in a long time. If you haven't heard of these guys, then you're about to. They are so cool. Their style is possibly best described as psychobilly/post hardcore punk, but big words aside, it could also be described as being blown by you're fave superstar with jason chainsawing your skull and elvis getting dark and nasty on yo ass! These guys are possibly the most innovative thing to happen for a long time, and i really am not just saying that. This is not just another pop act, and if you happened to catch their lead singer Guy on Never Mind The Buzzcocks a while ago, you might be aware that their lyrics arent what you could call polite chit chat. As for their live performance, it is stunningly intense and they really bring the music to life soooo well, and i even saw a new trick with regard to the use of vibrators on guitars. These guys really do deserve to be checked out, even if you find out you don't like it, you'll quite possibly never be the same again.
and now for the fun bit
So, after the gigs finished, i was stood at the bar with drumfan, totally dazed and just thinking 'Fuck My!' I think it must have taken a full half hour for all the hairs on the back of my neck to lay back down again, I swear I came, but anyway, the Wedge does this thing where they have bands on and stay open til 2, and seeing as drumfan wanted to get home, I ended up on my tod. (Jesus I feel ruff) So, while I'm in the bar area getting more drunk, the Lead singer, Guy, and the Bassist came into the bar for a relax, and i just couldn't help myself. I had to go and say Thankyou, and they're two of the nicest blokes I've met. They were telling me they've been on the road for the last three weeks full on rock and roll, and have got two more gigs before they get a rest, well kind of, but I did mention that I'd seen Guy, who was polite enough to introduce himself to me, (dead nice guys) on Never Mind The Buzzcocks, and the lyrics thing where the researchers totally got it wrong, coz the actual lyrics for celebrate your mother include the FUCK word, and he was telling me that he was fighting a battle between good and evil coz he hadnt slept for a couple of days(cant memeber exactly coz i was pissed), and i've now totally lost the plot cos my hangovers getting much worse. I hate it when this happens.
Random Mission
Yeah so, um, after I'd finished chatting to em, i saw a couple in the bar that I've seen around Portsmouth for a while, and have never met, but whats make them special is the way they dress. They're both pierced, and the gent out of the couple often goes out in dresses, but he does it so well. I dont know if it'd be classed as TV, cos he's not trying to look like a women at all. I guess the beard gives it away, but he just carries it off so well, and they're really nice ppl as well. Turns out that your man does computer games, first person shoot em ups mostly, and the lady makes bespoke bridal gowns and owns a shop called Devotion just round the corner from me, which also specialises in corsetry. It is so one of my fave shops, and the only one I've ever seen. Its extremely tasteful and looks like a little bit of a fairy tale if you catch my drift. She said I can pop in and say hello some time, so I'm definitely gonna take her up on her offer. I do like it when things like this happen. Kind of makes it seem worthwhile.

2003-05-15T16:17:00.000Z

I got 69'd today. Woohooo!!!!!, hyuck hyuck, woop woop, fnarr fnarr.

2003-05-14T20:24:00.000Z

I've just been considering that AKMA thing in the bar there on the right, you cant miss it, but it just doesnt do me justice. I was also thinking that cos of wot it says, surely it should show a picture of a wizard with a mohawk, or a day glo pink brontosaurus, mind you a sausage would probably be better. they really stand out.

2003-05-14T12:22:00.000Z

NEW LINK
Hopefully at some point in the near future a link will appear to a company called WILD who send me quite a few records, and are nice ppl. They are stars to tell you the truth. I'm still waiting to hear from the other companies, but once they make up their minds and give me a yes, I'll stick em on here. See, I am just so conscientious. Is there a women out there who wants to make me hers? I dont know, but i cant wait to find out.

2003-05-14T12:03:00.000Z

bit chilly today innit, but anyway, good news, my mums out of hospital!!! WAY, but it looks like she might have to have an operation, but it should just be a small one, just by the heart via her groin/thigh. super. yeah great.
GIG
but on a lighter note, on the 27th of may i'm playing at University Portsmouth Students Union doing a 1 hour battle of the rock DJs. WOOHOO! It should be fun, and I've also finished the CDs for my friends wedding which goes from huggably nice and lovey dovey to really really silly to some moshtastic action. 3 1/2 hours of joyousness, does that word really exist?
WEDDINGS
I still can t get over that they're tying the knot. i think there must be something in the water coz my cousin, ham, got married about 6 weeks ago in turkey, then dubai(for officialdom) and he's the last person on the planet you'd have thought would get married. fortunately lifes done the right thing by him and made him redundant so he now gest to be a man of lesuire. mind you he's quite happy to be a house husband, but i think thats so he can organise coffee mornings with all the local housewives, and talk cooking tips, sex, cleanin(he loves his cleaning) sex, money, sex, just like most housewives i guess.

2003-05-12T16:37:00.000Z

WOW A HALF CENTURY!!!!!!

2003-05-12T16:36:00.000Z

CHAPTER 5 V18b

'Lord, thats just about all of us,' sayeth Moses.
The Lord said, 'Yea, and the Israelites will only eat holy things.'
'Lord,' said Moses, 'I've tried seven supermarkets and they dont have any:whats wrong with haddock?'
'I give up, ' said the Lord. 'Whats wrong with haddock?'
Moses bit his lip and clenched his fist.
'What ails my son?' said the Lord.
'I'm pissed off, ' said Moses.

2003-05-12T13:02:00.000Z

what a mad weekend, and big mahoosive thanks to BW for giving me site of the week. She did say that I can make a little cup to stick on my blog, but i dont know how to. I tried getting one from the kitchen, but I couldnt get it to stick to the page, and every time i switched to a new window it got in the way. Saturday night was aextreme fun although i was ultra knackered from fridays bought of djing i went in for more at the union for the AU ball. It was mental. I could not believe my eyes when i walked in coz i was expecting a normal DJ booth type of thing, and they'd built me a beach hut! Its the best DJ booth I've ever ever worked in. It was so cool. And as if that wasnt enough, i got free drinks all night, which i was being conservative with, and then at the end of the night the bar manager offered me more beer and vodka chasers. So it was another day of suitable hangovers yesterday. Tres Bon!

X MEN 2
If you aint checked out X Men 2 yet, its got to be done. Brilliant film. I know its considered a sequel, but it is most definitely the continuation of the story from the first film. All the characters from the first film are in it, plus some new ones like Nightcrawler, whose a russian bible bashing mutant with teleporting powers that prove to be very useful, and i think storm has a bit of a soft spot for him, but he has hard spot for her, hyuck hyuck. but anyway, just in case anyone who reads this hasnt read X men the comic, Logan is a scientist, this bits important cos it might help you understand the film a lil, and is always tinkering with sub atomic particles, laser beams, and a welder while he's not kicking the crapola outa bad guys, sucking on a cigar and sharpening pencils. Fortunately, if you do miss it at the cinema, it's gonna be just as good on video, so you dont need to rush it, but its definitely worth it. Oh, and before i forget, if you have a girlfriend/boyfriend(gonna be rare this one) who starts yawning at the thought of star trek etc, but gets v excited over big brother, eastenders etc, leave him/her at home, they'll just spoil it.

AUSSIE ROCK-THE JINGLES, REGURGITATOR, KENNEL RECORDS. OUT NOW!!!!

Nope I never heard of em before either, but apparently their pretty big down under(smirk) and really really good. I do get a fair bit of music through, and sometimes i get a bit synical, and occasionaly i get shown the light. This is one them occasions. According to the bumf, these guys have been going since 1994, have had four albums out, and won several ARIA awards, one of which was for best album. All that aside, the musics brilliant. these guys are genuinely good musicians and have experimented with different styles of music, in an alternative vein, whilst managing to produce some stunning music. The tracks include styles such as Rock/Hip Hop, Indie with a nice melodic feel to it, and music bordering on Metal, but not quite. I really like it, i recomend that it needs at least a listen down your local hmv/virgin, and then you can make up your own mind. Go On, treat yourself.

2003-05-09T19:00:00.000Z

lummy, i'm up to 31 ppl on my counter. thats soooooo cool. WOW! So anyway, todays been pretty annoying. Doing my djing means i have tons of music, and i need cases to carry them in. one of thems this big ali thing that holds about 90ish CDs and costs £15 from argos, bit of a bargain, seeing as buying it as official DJ gear costs about £50, utter rip off, but the the problem was with the other one which is an old 7" vinyl case that over the last two years had been done in cos the lid had split. Sooo, i went to B&Q to see if they had anything that might do, totally in the knowledge that if worse comes to worse, i can invest in some gaffer tape. I thought i'd found the perfect thing, cos b&q are doing 3 ali cases that all fit inside one another for £20, but the middle size one was too small for my CDs. If I'd have remembered to take a cd with me this wouldnt have happened, i wouldnt have bought it, and i wouldnt have had to take it back. Thankfully, they were very understanding about it, and let me have my money back so's i could buy some gaffa tape and do a blue peter special on it. My old maroon case that was shafted is now totally incased in gaffa tape and would probably survive a small nuclear explosion, which is handy.

ooh and my stomachs alot better, just in case any one was wondering. right got to dash cos i'm due to start playing at 9. WOOHOO

2003-05-08T16:18:00.000Z

testing testing, my guts they are descending, my bunghole is a screaming and the toilets looking poor.
i'm running out of loo roll, the anusols nearly gone, i really hope it stops quite soon, I cannae tek it enymore.

2003-05-08T13:34:00.000Z

oooh, have i got a hangover or wot!! definitely worth it tho. I went to he union, as in students, with my friend leslie for her birthday and we got pretty hammered and went on a bottom pinching mission. HAHAHAHAHAHAAAAHAHAHAAAAAA. I still cant believe we did it, and even worse i cant believe it was my idea!!!!!!!! fortunately no one turned roiund and said anything, but if they did, the plan was to blame it on each other, so if leslie pinched a guys ass, i got the blame and vice versa. We got some people turning round and looking, but i dont know if they saw the funny side or not. I also saw Kerry and Kerry. I met one of em before through my friend emma, and she's a bit on the nice side, and flirty, and we always seem to have a really good laugh together. the other kerry is stunning. shes got demure off to a tee. phwoar. damn, i should've pinched their bottoms.

Anyway, time for some more music stuff. If you dont know it yet, Therapy? have got a new album out soon called High Anxiety, and it is an absolute masterpiece, and I'm not just saying that. It sooooooo rocks! the first track is called Hey Satan-You Rock, and it just makes for a brilliant opener to the album, and sets the pace for a full on rockfest that sums up the band really well. They definitely have not lost it. Check it out ppl. We alll need a bit of Therapy now and again.

2003-05-07T17:10:00.000Z

flippin heck, i've had 17 visitors, thats mental!!!! thankyou so much. WOW!! thats soo cool. Brightened up my day no end. I dont know if anyone commented or not, coz i can t work out how to acces it at squawkbox, but then i am new to this.
Anyway, phew, yesterday was a little bit hectic. I went up to london from dear old pompey to visit my mum, who's in hospital with suspected angina, but the drs are thinking it might be something to do with the muscles in her chest being inflamed, which is amazingly good news. I was also hoping to go and visit my grandad fred who fell over and broke his hip about four weeks ago. He had a stroke last summer, and has slowly been getting better, but his fall kinda skuppered his recovery and i got woken up by the phone ringing, and my aunt told me that he passed away on monday, which is a pisser, but at the end of the day he's not in pain anymore, and hopefully he's having a good ol knees up in wherever we might go to next with my nan and my brother.
After my brother passed away i found out that sometimes you find out more about ppl after they've died than when they're here on the planet we call earth, and the rest of the universe calls ublug( I dont actually know that, its what elvis told me, honest). It turns out that my grandad whilst serving as a marine (volunteered to get away from my great nan apparently) he did the arctic convoys in WW2, helped sink the Bismark, and brought back some photos of beautifully breasted african women, which none of us ever knew about.Now I dont know too much about the arctic convoys, apart from the fact that it was hell, and along with the arctic weather, the convoys also had to endure attacks from the German Submarines, called Wolf Packs. There is one thing that I definitely do know though, and that is that there is no medal that has been awarded to veterans of the arctic convoys, which means that the work that has been put into by lots of ppls grandfathers, etc, alive and deceased, has not been recognised by this countries government. There is one man that is trying to rectify this called Commander Eddy Grenthell, I hope I got the spelling right, so I'm gonna ask any one who reads this if they could contact their local MP with regard to this matter. I know it may not come to anything, but the Commander is in his 80s and every bit of help he gets might help him to achieve his aim.

SO RIP GRANDAD FRED, LOVE YOU LOTS. tony

2003-05-05T13:28:00.000Z

so anyway, time too slap my gums about something different. If you do happen to be reading this, you definitely need to check out drumfans sight via me link bar, he's a very nice bloke and helps me out with loads of stuff. A gem, and he's also a bloody good drummer as well, but the band hes in is splitting up by the looks of things which is a shame cos he's just spent loads on a new one. fingers crossed tho, i met someone last night who's forming a new band in southsea, and neds a drummer, and hopefully, things might work out. next stop the brits, if only, i might get to meet atomic kitten again. They're soooo petite its unbelievable, and a really nice bunch of ppl.
So i reckon its got to be time to do some music stuff, so.........
If you havent heard Hot Action Cop yet, its definitely worth it. They have a new single coming out soon called Fever For The Flava, and it is so good. Its like the RHCP used to be with a whole new edge. If you're into the Chillis, you'll definitely enjoy it, but even if you're not, its worth checking out. The cover is sooo nice as well. I'd love to meet the young lady featured on, just for conversation of course. Their album is gonna be out in the next month or so and its elf titled, which is nice. Makes life a little bit easier in the wild and whacky high paced 21st century.

2003-05-02T16:52:00.000Z

man this is cool. my first blog, am v excited, and you may notice, if anyone does read this, that i'm a tad frustrated.
At the moment I'm fairly convinced that life is playing a big joke on me. I'm trying to get to go on dates with women, and all that seems to happen is that i get dicked around or shagged. the shaggings not so bad, but this one night stand thing never leaves me with a nice warm glo, more a confused, what the fuck do i do now kinda thing. Do I wipe my cock on the the curtains before leaving, say thanks for putting me up for the night and leave a fiver on the side or go for another dip? and even worse if it comes to a what next type conversation. Lets see what happens, as suggested by many women i've had the pleasure of, scares me fucking shitless coz i know it really means is we'll go out together for six months, and then i can start trying to change you, playing brain games with your measly male intelect, and then start whinging and whining constantly about what i want and when we're gonna move in together. I've therefore decided that nature is an utter bastard and plays the cruelest tricks. It should be shot. Who in their right mind would set up a system that is inherently flawed, runs on hormones that last nine months just to make sure you get a sprog out, and requires that a simple pleasurable task turns into a ruddy nightmare. I see that i have absolutely no choice in the matter, and am now going to throw myself at the mercy of mother nature. this might not solve the problem, but at least i might not get so fucking pissed off. that feels better.